I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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