Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
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