I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I am available for nakedness
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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