Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize
