You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize