my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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