I wish I could teleport
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
