This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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