I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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