I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Randomize
