I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize