Can i not drive my cunt home
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Bring me that man meat
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Randomize
