We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
