Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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