I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
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The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
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I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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