you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
