It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
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You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
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Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
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