Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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