is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
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Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
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He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
I had to cum in my sink.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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