Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
