Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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