i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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