Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
