I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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