if i died would you start the facebook group?
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Randomize