come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
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