O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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