I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
