4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
