With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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