a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
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