I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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