last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
