Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
He kissed a someone with a penis
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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