Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
