proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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