So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
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With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
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At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.