I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Randomize
