That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Please, let me fuck your mom
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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