I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
