Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Randomize
