He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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