What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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