Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
