But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
You just made me feel so damn special
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Randomize