The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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