I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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