I think i sorta joined a cult last night
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
