Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Congratulations! We have a period
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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