A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
soo... how was my night?
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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